An XX Boy in an XY World || Changes

The Process [so far...]

The first lesson you will learn as you embark upon your transition is patience. Everything takes longer than you think it will, and even longer than you want it to. Transitioning [both physically and legally] is a gradual process, and a pretty amazing one, at that. Your physical changes are essentially the same as that of an adolescent boy's puberty--which normally takes up to 6 or 7 years to complete--so it's important to understand that you may not see obvious results for the first little while.

Another important thing to note is that not everyone has the genes to grow a big bushy beard, or develop a strong jaw-line, or gain substantial muscle mass. Look at your male relatives for clues to your family's male characteristics; if your dad has sparse facial hair, chances are you will, too. If your brother started balding in his 20s, you should be prepared for the same. Ultimately, your physical changes are going to differ in some ways from other transguys you see, and it's important to be okay with that. Just as cisgendered males all look different, the same is true for transguys.

**Obviously, these steps & timelines are specific to each individual, and will vary depending on your country/province/state/region.**

November 2, 2007: I realized that one of the biggest contributions to my gender dysphoria are my breasts. Since puberty, they have been a source of embarrassment for me. I confessed to my girlfriend that I wanted to purchase a binder and "try it out."
November 27, 2007: My first binder came in the mail today! It was from T-Kingdom and was very uncomfortable and difficult to put on.
September 4, 2008: Confided to a trusted college psychologist that I was experiencing feelings of confusion and unhappiness with regards to my gender. Each week we would discuss how I saw myself, how I felt others saw me, and what I felt was the solution to bridge the gap between the two. I didn't make the decision to transition right away, even though some part of me knew that's what I wanted to do. I was scared of the whole process; I didn't think I had the courage to embark on such a difficult journey.
September 9, 2008: My new binder from Underworks was delivered today and it is a million times more comfortable than my old one. It still doesn't make me completely flat [my chest is just too big for that], but it makes a huge difference when I button-up shirts, which was a big reason to get it.
December 18, 2008: Spoke with family doctor about wanting to begin hormone therapy. Received requisition for blood work. [get used to this! regular blood work is a huge part of your transition, and is something a good doctor will want to check on every 3-6 months or so.]
January 12, 2009: Received OK from family doctor to begin hormone process. Was referred to Lucas Walther at the Transgender Health Project in Vancouver for qualified psychologist suggestions.
January 13, 2009: Spoke with Erek at Trans Health and was referred to Dr. Melady Preece for Hormone Readiness Assessment [HRA]
January 16, 2009: Booked first psychology appointment with Dr. Preece.
February 5, 2009: First psychology appointment with Dr. Preece to evaluate readiness to begin testosterone treatment.
February 20, 2009: Received OK from psychologist to begin hormone therapy. Her evaluation of me was forwarded on to my family doctor.
March 3, 2009: Met with family doctor to discuss results of HRA evaluation. Family physician's office is responsible for booking referral appointment with local endocrinologist who has extensive experience with trans* hormone therapy.
March 5, 2009: Endocrinologist, Dr. Marshall Dahl's office contacted me to schedule first endo appointment and faxed a blood test requisition to my family doctor.
March 16, 2009: Met with Dr. Dahl for complete physical. We discussed the results of my blood work and the fact that heart problems have shown up in some male members of my family. He doesn't think my cholesterol levels are anything to be worried about, but suggested I eat a sensible diet, making cholesterol levels a consideration. He wrote me a prescription for 50mg/ml of Delastestryl testosterone to be injected every two weeks. Picked up prescription from my local pharmacy that evening. i have extended health benefits through my partner's work, so i paid $30 [out of pocket] for 3 months worth of T.
March 19, 2009: Saw my family doctor for my first T shot! I'm a big needle-phobe, so I have been seeing the nurse in my doctor's office for my T injections.; Approached the administration at my college to see about having my school records changed to reflect my preferred name. At first, they wouldn't do it without a legal change of name certificate, but an amazing trans ally on staff helped me explain to them why it was such a crucial thing to have my student records changed while waiting to complete the [lengthy] name-change process. They agree to do it with a letter from my doctor confirming my treatment for gender dysphoria. [see Resources page]
April 2, 2009: Two weeks on testosterone and I feel great. I should point out that I'm part-Italian, and had a substantial amount of body & facial hair before starting T; where a lot of guys would start to notice an increase in body hair [especially, legs, arms, chest and stomach], for me, it was business as usual!
April 18, 2009: One month on T! Voice changes come and go--some days it seemed lower, some days it seemed to stay the same. Being on such a low dose of T, my voice changes were too subtle to notice after only a month. Of course, this will depend on the person and dosage. Noticed more hair on my upper lip, chin and side-burn areas.; Finally received a letter from my doctor for my school records and approached the college administration office and had my student records changed to reflect my preferred [but not yet legal] name!; Also approached my supervisor at work to tell her of my transgender status and preferred name. She was very supportive and agreed to talk to the rest of the staff on my behalf.
May 8, 2009: 50 days on testosterone and my voice cracks a lot, but still hasn't dropped significantly. I've also been trying to hit the gym at least 2-3 days a week to try and lose some excess weight, as well as work my upper body.
May 16, 2009: Downloaded an application from Vital Statistics BC for a legal name change; asked about qualifying for a fee waiver, and was told that I must prove financial hardship and provide income statements for myself & my partner to corroborate. Picked up a fingerprinting kit from Vital Stats, as well.; **Note! The name change process varies from country to country and state to state. In Canada all name changes need to go through your province's Vital Statistics Agency. In BC, if you are 18 or older, you required to submit to an RCMP criminal background check, and must provide your fingerprints along with your application. If the idea of going to your local police station for fingerprinting fills you with dread, look for an authorized third party company, to have them done.
May 18, 2009: Submitted completed application & birth certificate to fingerprinting company [the organization fingerprinting you MUST submit your application to the RCMP on your behalf!] and paid all necessary fees to Vital Stats and IFS. All told, the cost to complete the name change process was about $162 CDN
May 20, 2009: Noticed significant changes in my body odors--have become more musky and stronger. Still need to find an aluminum-free deodorant that will last all day!
June 4, 2009: Change of Name certificate arrives in the mail!
June 7, 2009: After putting together a montage of voice clips, I finally noticed my voice had dropped slightly!
June 15, 2009: Back to the endocrinologist for 3 month update. He was happy with my blood work and increased my dose to 200mg/ml every two weeks [or 100mg/ml every week]; this is the normal testosterone range for an adult male.
June 16, 2009: Applied to Government of Ontario [my province of birth] for a new birth certificate showing my new legal name. This is extremely important! Once you've submitted your change of name application to Vital Statistics, your old birth certificate is destroyed. If you were born in the same province as where you changed your name, they will [usually] issue you a new birth certificate automatically. Otherwise, Vital Statistics will notify your province of birth of the name change [it can take up to 8 weeks for this to happen], and it's up to you to apply for a new certificate. Having an updated birth certificate will make your life that much easier when changing over other forms of ID [think passport, social insurance card, driver's license, etc], so I would encourage you to get one.; You will have to submit a certified copy of your change of name certificate. You can obtain one of these from a notary public; notary fees vary, so shop around. I had 3 certified copies made, at a cost of $54 CDN. The cost of a new Ontario birth certificate was $35 CDN.; **You may be wondering about changing your gender marker on your birth certificate--this is not easy to do, and in some states, impossible. [Have a look at this list for details, though for the most up-to-date information, you're better off contacting your local government office in charge of birth records & vital statistics.] Last I checked, all Canadian provinces require you to provide a letter from the surgeon who performed your SRS. For FTMs, this does not necessarily mean phallo or meta surgery! Chest surgery and a hysterectomy should suffice.**
June 26, 2009: Discovered the hard way that it's best to wait 8 weeks from the time you receive your Name Change certificate from Vital Statistics until you apply for a new birth certificate, especially if you're planning on using Service Ontario's expedited online ordering system.; Apparently, their online system is completely automated, so if your name change hasn't been updated in the system, the program will just automatically process your application using whichever name is currently on file. This is how I wound up with a new birth certificate bearing my old name. Now I have to go through the hassle of faxing all of my documentation over to Thunder Bay, waiting a week, and then following up with the centralized call centre in Toronto.
July 7, 2009: I had my 10th shot today! That makes it 110 days on testosterone. My voice has definitely dropped since I started T, and seems to drop slightly with each month that goes by. Apparently the most obvious voice changes usually occur in the first 6 months, and my 4 month mark is coming up next week!; After seeing my doctor for my shot, I was able to pick up a few letters I had asked her to write regarding petitioning ICBC and Passport Canada to change my gender marker to M on my documents. Apparently, if you've changed your name and can get medical confirmation from your primary care giver that you are undergoing medical treatment for gender dysphoria, ICBC is pretty good about changing your gender marker on your license or B.C.I.D. card. So, I brought them the letter from my doctor, my ORIGINAL change of name certificate, my old driver's license, and a second piece of ID with my old name and signature on it, paid my $17 replacement fee [pretty cheap, compared to some of my other costs], took my new picture and that was that! I should receive my new ID in about 2 weeks.; Once that magical piece of government-issued photo ID is in my hands, I can change over my bank records and credit card, my library card, my phone & cable accounts, my gym membership, and a whack of other stuff. I'm still waiting for my birth certificate to be sorted out....
July 13, 2009: My new driver's license arrived in the mail, ahead of schedule. Took it to the bank to get a new debit card and request a new Visa card. Also took it to the library, and my fitness centre to change over my ID with them. Still waiting for my new CareCard from ICBC.
July 20, 2009: Booked a consultation appointment with Dr. Cameron Bowman for top surgery today, set for August 20. Arranged to have my psychological assessment faxed over to the surgeon's office from Dr. Preece's office.
August 06, 2009: 5 months on testosterone and I'm feeling great! My voice has officially dropped and stayed dropped.[check out the video section to get an idea...] I get ‘sir’ all the time now, especially if I haven't shaved in a few days, and I'm wearing a hoodie or jacket to hide my chest. It feels wonderful. I'm still embroiled in a frustrating bureaucratic battle with the Office of the Registrar General in Ontario to get my correct birth certificate sent to me. [They claim that Vital Statistics BC never sent them the name change notification, yet Vital Stats assures me that is was sent on June 2nd, and that I'm not the first person who has dealt with this issue with Ontario.]
August 14, 2009: My new CareCard arrived today! That means I can finally have my health records updated with my new name on them. Because I'm covered under my partner's group plan, I had to submit the change of name request through her employer, and then leave it to them to contact MSP to update and issue me my new health card. All told, the process took about 6 weeks.
August 20, 2009: Met with Dr. Cameron Bowman today for my chest surgery consultation. See the Surgery Section for details.
August 21, 2009: I finally received my new birth certificate from the Office of the Registrar in Ontario. My gender marker hasn't been changed [can only happen with a surgeon's letter], but my name has been updated, so that's better than nothing. After all this nonsense, I'm not really looking forward to dealing with them once I need to change my gender marker...
August 26, 2009: Having finally received my updated birth certificate, I was able to visit the Service Canada office and apply for an updated SIN card [to be received in 10-15 business days], as well as a passport [to be received in 2-3 weeks]. My passport will be issued with a male gender marker.; A few notes about that: first, I needed to include a letter from my doctor [you can find the template I used in the Resources section]; secondly, I was only able to do so because I had secondary identification that matched my name and gender marker, in this case, my driver's license; lastly, because my birth certificate still lists me as female, my passport is only valid for two years, rather than the standard five. In order to get a five year passport, I have to update the gender marker on my birth certificate first [something that, in Ontario, can only be done with a surgeon's letter]. Fortunately, my surgery is in a couple of months, so I won't have to wait very long to get that process started.
January 23, 2010: Sorry it's been so long, although my physical changes have been less and less noticeable for some time now. Mostly, I've just noticed more body hair, particularly on my chest and around my surgery scars, which is nice. I've started working out my upper body, trying to build up the muscles in my chest, and trying to lose my chubby belly fat. It's slow goings, but I've been keeping a photo log of progress for the last 25 days, and have noticed some definite improvements!

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